I'm so that person. Y'know, THAT person. The one who doesn't call in fake sick to work, who feels bad if she doesn't feel she's achieved anything significant every single day, who feels she has to earn her rest time. Yeah, THAT person.
This is why this past week has been such a trial for me. I took a week off work to do (drumroll please) nothing.
It all started 2 years ago when I got a new account at work and it went completely sideways for a few months. I stockpiled so much overtime that it completely covered my two weeks off for my wedding and honeymoon. Then last year, we were already feeling the financial pinch of the wedding, so planned a car trip through the rockies as a cheaper trip alternative - which never happened, because we bought a house. I took my week vacation to renovate and move. My other week vacation was split between SMF and PAX, and then there was the bereavement leave for Granny D's funeral. All of it was just using up the last of my 2012 vacation.
So here I am, it's 2014 and I've still got all of my holidays from 2013 to spend as well as 2014 (which gives me a third week because I've been with the company over 3 years). I have 5 week vacation at my disposal....and I had no idea what to do or where to start. Jordan had the brilliant idea to just take time off - not vacation, but stay-cation. And I took that advice (because face it, the man is brilliant). I had planned to take Monday off anyways as a means to get back into the groove after the Suhaila workshop, when I decided why take a day when you can have a week?!? Seemed simple, brilliant, and awesome.
Awesome, that is, until I was face to face with my biggest enemy: free time.
Most people will not understand that last comment. But here and there you will find people nodding their heads in sympathy. We, the overachievers, have no idea what to do with free time. In fact, we are so loathe to suffer free time that we have lists and lists of make-work projects, places to go, things to do, people to see, that we are rarely, if ever, idle. Idleness is so uncomfortable to us that we would rather be pulled in a million different directions by over-booking our time, rather than spend a few minutes without plan or purpose.
Saturday and Sunday were easy to survive....sorta. Those were the days of the Suhaila workshop. I was too busy and exhausted and sore to think. Monday was another fairly easy day to get through. I had survived the weekend and deserved a day of nothing more than rest and Ibuprofen. But by Monday night I was already feeling the buzz of discontent. The nagging voice at the back of my head that wants me to do "things". Sitting on the couch sewing my costume for the weekend's competition was not enough. More "things" would have to be added if I was to feel content over the coming week.
Tuesday I had lunch and a lovely idyllic afternoon with Joy and Pandora. It's amazing how many hours you can pleasantly while away cuddling the cutest little bundle of baby. And as always, Joy is wonderfully entertaining company. We had a blast. As soon as I got home I was quickly whisked away, this time by Kush, to Bellyco rehearsal. By the time I got home I had some dinner and an enjoyable evening of relaxation (fully justified by dance rehearsal). Wednesday I spent the morning with Jordan as we toodled off to Vancouver to pick up his glass-blowing projects (so proud!), and then I walked around Scott Rd. looking for costume bits and baubles in Little India, finally returning home and tidying the living room and dining room.
Thursday was....wait, I can't really remember. Huh. Wow, that must've been SOME day. Oh yeah! I tidied the spare bedroom. It almost killed me to do so. What a downer! Every little thing I moved or got rid of, there were 20 or 30 more little things needing homes. This is going to be an on-going achilles heel for me. That room spells DOOM. Gotta be in the right frame of mind or else it just brings me crashing down, mood-wise.
Friday I had a hilariously interesting morning. Got up early, dropped Jordan off in Port Moody at a clinic, and then decided to have an adventure. I planned on going to Vancouver' Little India on Main Street to look for more jewelry for my duo with Karyn. After almost an hour of driving, (plus pitstop for gas and a loo) I found Little India.....deserted. Yup, the shops were all closed or gone. Gone where?....Surrey. *rolling eyes*. I had driven all that way to learn that the shops were in my own back yard. D'oh! But not to be out-done, I drove another 40 min to Surrey only to discover that shops don't open until they feel like it. *facepalm* I managed to find a place, The Punjab Cloth House, that was not only open, but also had the stuff I was looking for. SCORE!
By noon I was back home, and trying not to feel lost and at odds. I dyed my hair, cleaned the bathroom, had lunch, sat for an hour, and then started in on my new Goddess cossie. By the time Jordan got home, dinner was nearly done, and I felt pretty darn good about myself. I finished my costume that night, and wrapped up my week off on a high-ish note.
All in all I am satisfied and disappointed with my time off. I feel I was more lazy than I'd intended to be, and didn't get done all the sorts of things I'd hoped to. On the positive side, I didn't over-plan my days, and allowed them to just "be", which is a definite improvement for me....even though it's SO HARD to do....or not do, as the case may be.
Today is Saturday, and I'm back in my pre-work weekend groove. Today is competition with my Bellyco sisters at the Bell Centre, and then Valerie and Janice are coming over to tell me all about their raucous trip to Vegas. I can't wait to hear all about it. Maybe one day I will be able to drop everything and go on a spur of the moment girly trip to Vegas.
Maybe. But that's for another day.
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